My Dad

My Dad

My name is Trevor Lighten, I am Geoff’s favorite son – my siblings may try to deny that but I know it is true.  I have four children and a lovely supportive wife.

One thing constantly comes to mind when thinking about my dad over the last few days – my Dad left a wonderful impact on the world.  Sometimes that impact was small and other times it was enormous.  He positively influenced others in his role as a son, brother, uncle, grandfather, bishop, teacher, missionary, friend, father and husband, he was fiercely devoted to my mother and his children.  He knew how to relate to others regardless of their position in society.  He had genuine love for others and in turn they loved him.  Several of the medical staff who worked with him over the last few weeks commented to us how much they loved my dad.

In my case, his impact was enormous.  So much of who I am and where I am in life is a direct result of the love that he had for me.  No one has influenced me more than my dad.  He never gave up on me; he always encouraged me and built my confidence.  He showed me a good example and taught me throughout my life.  One small example of this is how I remember is that sometimes he would open the door for my mom and other times he would have me get the door for her or my sisters. 

He did things that made me feel loved.  He played basketball games with me and my brothers until the neighbors would complain that we were playing too late.  He would play one on one basketball with me until I was old enough to beat him – and then it was over.  He loved to play games and rough house with us kids. 

We used to wrestle a lot and as I got older I could take him down pretty easily.  However, when one time when I was about 17 or 18 he got me into an awkward hold that had me crying uncle – he held on to that glorious moment for the rest of his life.  Every now and then, including when he was on his hospital bed, he would remind me and others about that time he had me begging for mercy.

One of my favorite experiences with my dad was when he first took me to a Denver Broncos game.  My entire life we had never gone to a game because they were too expensive and they normally played on Sundays.  I never thought about going to games but I loved watching them with my dad and brothers.  When I was 13 the broncos were in the playoffs and the game was on a Saturday.  I remember waking up that day looking forward to watching the game on tv.  I went down stairs and laid down on the couch when my dad threw a bag of peanuts in my lap.  I looked at him and he flashed two broncos tickets in his hand.  We sat in the tip top corner of mile high stadium and watched a game that was so good they made documentaries about it.  It was this and many other experiences with my dad that made me feel special and loved. 

My dad had a legendary sense of humor that has and will be well documented today.  He had a quick wit and was always good for a one liner.  Several people said that he looked like Elder Richard G Scott and two woman joking at his office recently said “Elder Scott, what is your next talk going to be about”, my dad replied “revenge”.   He also claimed to know who the three Nephites are, although it was a revolving list.  Rush Limbaugh was always on the list.   Mike Shannahan, coach of the Denver Broncos, was on the list for a time.  No BYU coach ever attained enough success to be on the list.

My father loved the Lord Jesus Christ.  He was very introspective and took his salvation seriously.  He often asked questions of us he had about something he read in the scriptures or book or talk that day.  He would bring those up and it would lead to a gospel discussion.  He said that if he were going to die he felt at peace with how he lived his life. 

I will miss my dad, he is my best friend.  I wish that he were going to be around to influence my children.  But the character he instilled in me will influence my children, and my children’s children.    His influence will bless the world forever. 

My dad did not pass how we thought he would or when he thought we would.  This week has been a week of mourning for those who love him.  I have thought over the years what would happen if I lost those who are so close to me like my mom or my dad or my wife.  I am struggling and a little confused about this.  However the clarity is coming and I do believe in the plan of salvation.

On Sunday evening I took some time to pray and reflect and seek comfort, one scripture came to mind Mosiah 16:7-9

7 And if Christ had not risen from the dead, or have broken the bands of death that the grave should have no victory, and that death should have no sting, there could have been no resurrection.

8 But there is a resurrection, therefore the grave hath no victory, and the sting of death is swallowed up in Christ.

9 He is the light and the life of the world; yea, a light that is endless, that can never be darkened; yea, and also a life which is endless, that there can be no more death.

I can say that amid the mourning and sadness I have had in the last few days that I have also had beautiful moments of peace, I have felt a little of what Abinidi meant when he said “the sting of death is swallowed up in Christ”.  I know that peace comes from the Holy Ghost and a Father in heaven who loves me. 

I was blessed with one of the best fathers to walk this earth.  I am forever grateful that he was and is my dad.  As a result of Geoff accepting the gospel 52 years ago I have knowledge of a Father in Heaven who loves me, I know that I will see my dad again.  I am truly proud to be a son of my Father in Heaven and I am proud to be a son of Geoffrey Richard Lighten.

In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.